Haven't been blogging for a while. Yes, been super busy. Not only with schoolworks, but also with my new CG, Solagracia. It has been a blessing to join them. It took me quite a while to get used to the different aura of this CG from my old one, Agape. But thank God, at last I could truly fit in. Thanks loads for this great new brothers and sisters in Christ.

Starting from tomorrow, I shall call Baillieu my home. This is my last shot to do justice to the money my parents have spent for my school fee. I've been slacking too much for the past 2 years. Maybe it's time for me to face the fact: Slacking is not a funny thing! I need to grow up. Huakakaka... Look who's talking.

Well, gonna sleep now. Just pray to God that the following weeks I can resist temptation and study hard. Pray for me also, guys.

Planned to make indonesian pancake today. Well, I bought all the ingredients last week. All? Well, apparently not. I forgot to buy the special chocolate sprinkles for the pancake. Let me explain why I can't use ordinary cooking chocolate or chocolate sprinkles. It's because these special chocolate sprinkles are coated with a lard-type-substance. As a result, they don't melt readily and stay on top of the pancake mix during the frying process. Ordinary chocolate would melt and sink due to the heat and as a result, it wouldn't turn out nice.

So, I quickly rushed to IGA across the street to get some. They didn't have... So, I went to QV. Surprise surprise, they also don't have. I figured that maybe the choc sprinkle is an Indo thing. I was thinking whether I wanted to go to Glenferrie (the Indo town) to get the choc sprinkles. But I couldn't be bothered. So, I went home empty handed. When I was in King Street, I just remembered that the Chinese groceries should have it. Argh... Too lazy to go back to the city again.

Pancake day is officially cancelled. Next week perhaps... Sorry, Andri - Su - Bebe.

I've been studying like mad for the past 3 days... preparing for IBS (Integrated Biomedical Science) test. Wah lao, before the holiday, I was determined to score an H1 for this test. Due to a lack of interest in studying during the holiday (humm, he he), I lowered my standards. I aimed for a decent mark: an H2A or an H2B. After trying to cram 43 lectures in 3 days, I decided to once again lower my expectations. This time, a pass would be enough.

Hemm, the exam questions were not difficult. Difficult would be an ultimate understatement. They were extra complicatedly scrudidlyumptuously difficult!!! Now I am happy to aim for a mark above zero. Oh, the horror! I had to use my feelings instead of my brain to answer most of the questions.

Here are some of the pics I took while Su, Andri and I were studying in the Baillieu library on Monday.


Su, cramming her stuff!!!


A carton of soy milk should help my brain to digest the super hard metabolism lecture


Andri, the nerd, is happily reading Meitantei Conan (comic) while we were studying.

Anyway, the test wasn't so bad. I may get a very bad mark. But, it's all good. I totally deserve it. Btw, thanks so much for Andri who treated us in Gandaria for his 19th birthday. Thanx a lot, dude. Sorry we got you the whole set Tales of Narnia instead of a Su in in a box.

Hehe, been a long time since I'v last updated my blog. Not much to add actually. Just wanna thank my Lord for being the best thing that has ever happenned in my life. Thanks for always being there. Thanks for letting me have everything I have now. Thanks for being such a great teacher, dad, bestfriend. You are great, Lord. How did I manage to survive all those 19 years without You in my life? I love you, Lord. You are awesome.

CARRY ME
-Hillsong-

You lead me in to Your courts
Surround me with Your love
I walk with You
I do not fear

In this place
Dreams are made
In this place
Where You are
Carry me here
In Your arms of love
Draw me close to You
I want to be where You are
I want to be where You are

You carry me, You are my strength
I've learnt to trust in You
And once again
I'm reaching out

This blog is basically my train of thoughts right now. Please don't read it if you are very sensitive as it is quite harsh. The past week I have learned something very important. I have been trying too hard to be someone I'm not. I've been trying to fit in by conforming to whatever the people around me want me to be. I am sorry that I am not as perfect as people want me to be. I am sorry that my jokes are different. I am sorry that I do things differently. I am sorry that I am an odd bird. I'm sorry that I am too annoying for you to handle. I'm not going to change myself anymore just to fit in. I am what I am. My God loves me for what I am, and He doesn't hate me for what I am not. So, if anyone gets angry at me just because I do things differently... Tough luck! I'm not even bothering anymore.

I have never felt so bad about myself before the start of this year. I felt that I was so useless and that everything I did was always wrong. The fear of rejection haunted me all the time. Never in my life was I an object of anger and of annoyance as frequently as what I had experience in the last semester. You know what, maybe I do need to be someone else to be accepted. But I'd rather not be accepted than acting to be someone that I'm not. This week, as I try to spend more time with my friends, I realised that I have many friends that accept me for who I am. And, I am thankful for that. I thank the Lord for being so kind to me.

I guess, when Moon Ley asked me the question whether I was leaving Agape due to my feelings or due to the Lord's guidance, I would answer that it was (and still is) due to my feelings. But again, the fact that the Lord has introduced me to a place where I think I could grow more IS a sign of guidance. Yes, I have always been someone I was not during my time in Agape. It's quite hurtful, but it is true. Well, having said that, the decision is more less finalized.

I am sorry that by doing this I am hurting people around me. But again, who would care anyway? Don't get me wrong, I don't hate those who are angry or pissed with me or have made me feel bad. I'm just saying that it is better for you (and me) to stop hurting each other by minimizing our interactions.

Wuarh... Yesterday was such a tiring day for me. But it was fun, though. It was my good friend - Icha's birthday. We decided to take her to my place and we were to bake a cake for her. I decided to bake green tea - red bean cake since Icha likes red bean. So poor thing, Icha was to be locked inside my room while all of us were working in the kitchen. Hahaha. Here's the chronology:


Prepare pans, baking trays, mixers, scales, spatulas and all those needed to bake cakes.


When the cake is ready and cooled down, personalise it with writings using chocolate filling piped through a cone. Erm, I don't think that's the correct idea, Natalia.


Start to make decorations!


Cake is ready to be served. I love the contrast.


Birthday girl makes a wish and cuts the cake...


and distributes them to her close friends. (that's us, btw)


End the celebration with eating in an La Porchetta. Nyammm!!!

Straight after the party, I went to meet Michael and Julie to pay a visit to their CG. Their CG is fun and kinda jayus. But yeah, it was all good. Hemm...

I went to see The Impressionists just now with Darryl, Linsey and Sofia. What are the impressionists, you may ask? Well, quoting from the definition written in one of the posts there: "they are impressionists in the sense that they render not the landscape, but the sensation produced by the landscape."

In 1874 a group of French painters held an exhibit of their work in Paris. Art critics were outraged by the "unfinished" appearance of the paintings. The artists were strongly criticized for their sloppy techniques and workmanship. One critic used the term "impressionistic" to mockingly describe all of the exhibited work. After the exhibit the painters adopted this term and became known to the art world as "The Impressionists." Today the works of these artists and many of their contemporaries are among the most popular and valued in the world. Some of these artists are Renoir, Degas, Sisley, Van Gogh. Monet, Morissot, Pissarro and many more.

Some of the works that really struck me, are these ones:


The picture by Van Gogh. The darkness gives a more vibrant colour than the day. That's what Van Gogh said. Well, I do see why.


The Parisiens, by Claude Manet. I love this one. It shows how the French in the 19th century are not united.


Morissot's painting of a mother babysitting. So sweet.

What have I been up to?

1. Happy 19th birthday Andri!!!
We came over to celebrate Andri's birthday on Monday the 21st of September. The candle-blowing ritual was such a cheapskate moment. The two candles, which made the number 19, were actually secondhand. They were used before for Michelle's birthday. Louise then shouted to Andri to quickly blow the candles coz we would need them for Su's upcoming birthday. Duh!
Playing bridge was super fun! We started at 12 a.m. and the game ended at 4.30 a.m. Some stupid things that I did while playing:
1. Mistaking spade for clubs.
2. Always quiet during bidding:
Lou: "Andrew, can u please say something (during bidding)."
Dru: "Pass!"
Everyone: "Duh!"


2. Cooking!!!
Been cooking a lot these past few days. After neglecting working in the kitchen for a year or so, I have actually started cooking again. Not only that, I have also been baking. I love cooking, but I hate washing the dishes. Why is that? I don't know why, but I think it's because cooking needs creativity. It'as a kind of art. On the other hand, washing is just a monotonous boring routine. Hemm, such a weak argument yea?

It has been a while since Ive updated my blog. It's not that I am lazy or that I don't have time. It's just that until yesterday, I am unsure whether I should share about this matter in the web. Shall I start with how Alpha Camp went? Yea, I think I should.

Camp was awesome! I've met many new people and even know them quite well. It is a very different environment from OCF (my current CG). The camp took place in Mount Disappointment... er, I'm not joking. I left for the campsite at 8 p.m. The journey normally takes 1.5 hours. However, we got lost. It took us 2.5 hours to get to the place. I was so panicked coz the car was a sedan - I get roadsick more easily when travelling with a sedan - and the dark environment, all of a sudden, made me felt claustrophobic. For the last half an hour or so inside the car, I was so panicked that I almost caught an asthma attack. Sounds so stupid, right? But it was all good. We arrived safely and just in time for supper (a very late one).

The next morning, I went sightseeing with my friend, Roxanna. The camp is surrounded by acres of wood. The ghostly scenery I was confronted with the night before turned into such a magnificent view. The forest seemed so scary at night, but in the presence of light, the view is just breathtaking. During our daytime freetime, we played soccer, pool, table tennis, air hockey, and many other cool games. And at night, we played strange games like Bing Bang Wah, Fuzzy Bunny, Mafia, Truth and Dare. It was sooo fun. We also went walking around the campsite at night. It wasn't such a good idea coz we managed to get lost. The scenery was beautiful, though. The stars were so magnificent. We can see shooting stars a number of times. Aaaah, the things that we take for granted. The Lord creates such a wonderful world for us. This is Eden.

The hard part is that these people I met in camp are my lentil soup. Meaning that I am feeling such a connection with them that I might leave OCF. A lot of things are inside my mind. I am just going to take everything slowly - step by step. I can't promise anything now. I'm just gonna see where God takes me. - SoRrY -


The scenery during daytime is breathtaking. I wonder why it is called Mt. Disappointment.


When we were lost in the forest at night. It's not like everyone was panicking.


Yes, I had to do a skit. I totally humiliated myself.


my lentil soup


cute photo. i like this picture a lot.

The soundtrack of Jeux D'enfants or Love Me If You Dare is officially stuck inside my head. It is now the national anthem of my shower routine. I just can't help it. That movie left such a deep impression to me. I can't explain why. It just did.

Hemm, Friday... It will come tomorrow. I will be going on Alpha Camp for the weekend. So, I won't be blogging for a while. Hope that I can get loads of good pictures around the campsite. I'm not hoping too much out of this camp. I just want to be in a quiet environment so that I can hear what He is trying to say more clearly. That is all I want.

To Shanna, have a safe journey back to Singapore.